The Most Interesting Author In The World (AKA “No Kool-Aid For You!”)

I haven’t mastered the epic grandiosity of being me. And while overall in the great scheme of eternity, this is probably a good thing, it’s doesn’t help when you’re an author.

You see, when you’re an author, you’re selling yourself. You have to. It doesn’t matter if you refuse to do interviews and act like you’re a living William Faulkner. The very act of refusing interviews is a brand in itself (hello Mr. Cormac McCarthy). You have these things called books, and they have YOUR name on them. If you write nonfiction, then it’s a no-brainer. It’s all about you and your platform. But even with fiction, it’s about selling a story, not just in the pages but in the author blurb.

Some authors have mastered the art of making their own Kool-Aid. You see them stirring big vats of it with a big old rubber spoon and you wonder what in the world they’re doing. Sometimes you even take a sip from their plastic cup and you realize that yep, it’s just Kool-Aid. It might taste sweet and feel refreshing, but it’s still just Kool-Aid.

There’s something about believing in yourself as a writer. You absolutely have to or else you’re not going to get very far in the field. I also think you have to help sell those books, meaning you have to promote and talk about them and engage readers. I struggle between overdoing this and not doing this enough.

But then there’s stepping over the abyss and sinking into a delusional world where you begin to talk like Yoda.

I’m not joking, either.

Sometimes I hear authors talking as if they wrote the second book of John in the Bible. Not in public but in private. I’ve had conversations with bestselling authors who were doing amazing things and absolutely knew it. They not only knew it, but they liked to remind everybody about it. They had bought into their press. They’d started sipping their own Kool-Aid. And they were starting to walk and talk like a live infomercial.

Then there are authors who try to outdo The Most Interesting Man In The World. You know, that sophisticated man with the accent surrounded by wealth and women in those Dos Equis commercials. Not even Donald Trump or Jay-Z are that interesting. Yet there are some authors who look and act and talk like they are The Most Interesting Author In The World. The very mention of another book idea should stop the world in its tracks.

Sometimes, the public buys this, the myth and the fantasy. It’s marketing and it works. Why do people spend lots of dollars trying to make this car out to be The Most Amazing Vehicle In The World or to claim this liquor to be The Most Awesome Beverage In The World or to have this bra be The Most Sexy Piece Of Clothing In The World?

I, for one, know I’m not the most interesting author in the world. Those around me know this too. So if I started to act like this, they’d all start mocking me. They’d all see through the bologna. They wouldn’t just refuse a sip of the Kool-Aid. They’d knock down the table of cups and empty the jug.

But still, sometimes I wish I could live a life of mystique. To leave readers wondering and breathless in anticipation. If I had enough sales, perhaps everything would be different. J.K. Rowling helps her brand by remaining out of the public spotlight. Because even the biggest authors like J.K. Rowling and Stephen King are not Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. (Okay, Rowling is royalty, but she’s unique).

Whenever I mention a story idea, I sometimes feel like a dog barking at a stranger walking by on the sidewalk. Eventually you just tell the dog to be quiet because you’ve heard it a hundred times before.

Then again, sometimes I feel like there’s nobody else doing what I’m doing, that there’s nobody out there in my same boat. That I’m unique and that the world will wake up one day and get me and then I might possibly be “The Most Interesting Author In The World” (say that with a South American accent please).

For now, I might be one of the top ten most interesting authors in the western suburbs of Chicago. But I don’t know—I know some really interesting authors around here.

Becoming a father is a reminder that life is not about me. Being a Christian is a reminder that life shouldn’t be about me. So maybe it’s a good thing that I don’t make my own Kool-Aid and try to get people to drink it. Knowing me, every single cup I’d make would taste different anyway. The Kool-Aid branding police would come to me and in a Nazi-like tone tell me “No Kool-Aid For You!”

And you know what? That’d be just fine.

11 Comments

  1. Reading this Travis makes me think of a Margaret Thatcher quote that goes something like… Everyone used to be about doing something…now everyone just wants to be someone. (I saw Iron Lady last week.) Because I’m around social media stuff all the time this quote really caught my attention.

    I’ve worked with authors and I’ve seen the gamut of what you described. Have to say my favorite authors to work with are those who are just themselves, living their lives and sharing it with the rest of us. I think when anyone tries to be something they aren’t it never works.

    Thanks for this post and for the reminder of my need to stay grounded and that what I do is not about me!

  2. Great post, Travis. That dog barking at a stranger feeling? Been there a hundred times, maybe a thousand. I'm a terrible self-promoter because I hate talking about myself. And I hate feeling like some cheesy door-to-door salesman. When someone asks me about my new book I try to downplay it. That's probably not a good thing. I do love talking about the writing process, though, as long as the spot light is off of me 🙂

  3. Thanks Coolkayaker. Mike–thanks for your comments. It's getting better for me. Recently I've told myself–look, I'm a writer, publishers like what I do, it's nothing to be ashamed about. And I could sell books at a gas station (actually I think I have). The thing is trying to be something you're not. Walking around like Tolkien or something like that. I look at Stephen King's example–he never tries to be anything but who he is. He loves pop culture. Even though he's sold a gazillion books, he's still like anybody else.

  4. This, Travis, is why I resist becoming an author. Being a magazine writer keeps me away from the Kool-Aid.

    P.S. I did hear Cormac McCarthy give an interview on NPR's "Science Friday," along with the guy who did the film on the cave art in France and someone else. Amazing!

  5. Travis, it's not what you do it's who you are. God gave you writing talent so yopu could change lives(like mine) and uplift us. There are so many dark depressing novels out there that go nowhere and leave the reader empty. Yours never do! I'm reading 40 now, and I still say you get better with every book. I started this one thinking you couldn't outdo "Every Braeth You Take". Well, you have. You may not sell as much as Stephen King, or others, but you move people. Please keep doing what you're doing. It's your gift.
    Jim Pennington

  6. Megan mentioned Cormac. I heard his "Child Of God" was optioned for a movie, directed by James Franco. Short read (230 pages?), I loved it! Much more accessible than, for instance, Blood Meridian. I encourage everyone to read it, and the movie will likely be a nose pincher.

    Lester Ballard, the backwoods maniac, misunderstood villian, or martyr for good? Excellent read. I thought I'd mention that b/c Travis is a fan.

  7. I can see why 40 is your favorite. It's exceptional. You get better and better with every book. Despite the 400 pages(which at first seemed daunting), the book flows. I thought Tyler came to life because he kept talking. I understood him more becuase of what some would call ram,bling thoughts. It was brilliant storytelling, Travis. Keep writing such moving and unforgettablle books!
    Plus, love the mentions of so many of my favorite bands, both past and present! I honestly thought I was the only one in America who had heard of New Order, Front 242, and Meat Beat Manafesto. Made me relate to the story even more.
    How much of Tyler is you? Have you ever based a character on yourself? I'm just curious.
    Will you write your story?
    Jim

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